what is "Ramadamdam"?

"good morning" the first sentences that come out from my mouth every other day when i'm working. my hello's goes out to the whole factory if i'm being honest! so in 2 weeks time, this will all resume back to normality. normality as in start working at 7am again (currently i come in at 730am), breakfast at 930-ish am, touch out at 2pm or 3pm. and always make sometimes for a fag or two in between the hours.

but now its Ramadan, am currently haven't been smoking for almost 2 weeks, while working i mean. so haven't been talking as much to people around except those who are in the same department, and of course shortie (forklift driver who ruins my life at work..haha! kidding). so one day, just finish work, and bump into an Englishman, who is a fellow smoker. so we start talking while waiting for a friend who is still in the office.

Man: So, no smoking during Ramadamdam ay?

Lady: hmmm..NO! u know that u silly cow..

Man: i just think all these fasting thingy doesn't make sense. What is it for? Smelly mouth! Not eating! Not smoking!

Lady: Oiiii! of course it does..in 2 weeks time, u'll see me getting skinnier than ever after a month of 18hours fasting every single day! ha ha

Man: Dont be silly! ure not fat (ahuh! yeah, i am NOT! hell YES I AM!!!)

Lady: ok listen, why are u making a big fuss out of it? why are u complaining so much? u are not the one who's fasting anyway. i am! and i am not complaining at all.

Man: No, i just want to know, what is it exactly for?

Lady: To appreciate what we have. Good food, a roof to stay under, nice cloth, although ur shoes need to go dude (u can literally see them socks. not just the glimpse, almost the whole damn thing!)

Man: argh, that's nonsense. bla bla bla bla

Lady: jog along now. bla bla bla. oh by the way, its not Ramadamdam u dumb ass! its RA-MA-DAN!!

Man: i like it that way..Ra-ma-dam-dam! *grin* by the way, do me a favor. stop walking like a penguin when Ramadamdam is over!!

Lady: pissed off! its slippery u moron..i don't wanna hafta fall on the stupid disgusting floor.

that's basically a conversation between one Englishman and me at work. See, i honestly believe, he doesn't mean anything about that Ramadamdam or the needs to fast. He was just being curious. I appreciate that he asked. I appreciate that he has his own opinion. and trust me, hes a mature open-minded middle age Englishman. Not some stupid wanker who knows fucko! Furthermore, he's an atheist. He's basically a free thinker and in his world, everything is whatever, and live life as it is.

My point is, u can't even educate a muslim, him or herself to understand the needs to fast, let alone a non-muslim. to think their questions are difficult to answer, imagine when they ask "why is he not fasting then? he makes it looks ok? he's a muslim too". they are non-muslims, although there's always a clear line that they should never try to cross when it comes to religion, but as far as im concern, as long as they respect me and my belief, its all good, which they are.

i am not perfect. i am a muslim. i may not be a good one, but its between me and God. i am sure, i'll get there one day. being a good muslim that is. i'll wear my hijab. i know i will, because i am born a muslim, and i'll die a muslim. a good muslim that is! insyaAllah.

-lady-

14 Ramadan

Alhamdullilah, its 14 Ramadan today. i am actually honestly been counting my fasting days, as it feels like ive been fasting forever. here in London, its different. its tougher because of two things, everyone else is eating but u, and its summer, so expect a longer day. thank God the weather is being nice. but, at work its a different story. working in a bakery factory, having to smell food the whole day, having to pass by trays full of good food, its oh so tempting! although outside its not that hot, but man inside the building is worse than the jacuzzi! surrounded by ovens..seriously, i mean ovenS!! not 1, not 2, not 3..but 6 of them! no air because all them squareheads think human being inhale Co2 and not O2. before fasting month, think i drink at least one bottle of 500ml water. but now, i am swallowing my own saliva. urgghhh! but coming into the 3rd week, it should be easy going through another 2 more weeks i supposed ay?

so, its been homemade food for break fasting everyday for the past 12days (only 1day that i decided not to cook because umpy's taking a pissed..so its kebab instead!) everything from fried noodles to soup noodles, from lamb chop to battered fish. everything turned out alrite, or delicious i must say (haaa) except one thing..RICE PUDDING! i hate u rice pudding. that bloody chef in good cook didn't give any measurement for the amount of rice i supposed to put in, and being greedy me, i put in lots of them rice pudding in there forgetting that RICE as it is, will makes the rice pudding stick together like a proper rice..and not all creamy and watery rice pudding as it should be. and so, i decided, its me against the rice pudding real soon. REVENGE time. haih

coco pops crackles

so-called rice pudding..FAILED!

battered fish, wedges and fried noodles

noodle soup

chicken porridge

my mommy called today, and asked what's for break fasting. told her i really wanna eat/drink ABC. ABC bomba (because the stall is located behind a Fire Brigade) that is! Gosh! that's the best ABC ever, after the one in Section 3, Shah Alam, which according to Adhwa, is no more there. then mommy said "awww, i can't help u with that one. u have to have that machine!" sigh. so, i made a promise to myself, next year i'll be home for Ramadan. Again, two reasons, the same reason because it will be a proper summer,hence it will be a long day, much longer than this one..and second the fact that i cant have any BBQ when that's the best time to indulge myself with nice BBQ. oh man!

and also, the 2011/2012 EPL kicked-off yesterday! the much anticipated time of the year (for me) is finally here. all football actions. watching Match of The Day. its gonna be another good year for Man United, i can feel it! yes, one because i am a fan..a HUGE one! two, because we simply are the best! (i have a big mouth, thanks!). so yeah, starting from this week, whatever i post, there will be some football element somewhere. its like an addiction. but its a good one and in a good way!! *grin* so Bolton is on top of the table today, despite playing on the same day with Arsenal and Liverpool, who only managed to secure 1point each. Man United and Chelsea will be playing today, Man City will take on Swansea on Monday night.

we are the best around!!

alrite then, its time that i stop talking about football now..i need to eat for Sahur! in the mean time, u lot have a good weekend. Stay safe. i shall annoy u next time. God bless!

-lady-

chaotic London

went out of the house on Sunday afternoon feeling confused on the number of closed shops along the high street. until Sunday night, watch the telly, get on the internet and then it all start making sense.

would there be a riot if the victim have shot the police first before the police shoot him? hands down, the answer will be an absolute NO! i sincerely understand why the police shoot him first, or else he'll shoot them first. so, at the end of the day, one of them will eventually fell on the ground bleeding, well in this case, dead. but the riot embarked after tonnes of his so-called followers in his 'star gang' felt it was unnecessary to shoot him. and yes, i understand the needs to feel upset and the angst that cause the incident.

and yes, i understand the family's dissatisfaction over how the police handle the situation by not letting them know personally that he was shot dead if that remains the reason why they were so upset. but would i believe words they're feeding the community by saying that he was a good man, and that he would never shoot anyone? no, i don't believe a word! hence, the need to go on a street to protest their dissatisfaction? ok, understood! but then, rioting and looting? for a child aged between 10-15 years of age? enlighten me with the fact that they should be at home doing their homework or studying rather than outside rioting and looting? oh wait, school is not cool, rioting is! we'll see where you'll be in 10 years time then. chavs!

why burn those buildings? why burn those buses? why burn those civilians' cars? why smashed and binned the stores? it is not rioting anymore. its the 3rd day of the chaos, and it definitely no sign of stopping them just yet. the fact that the parents of these kids allow them to go on the street and conduct thuggery makes it ok? the community is not being racist (although i am sure some are) but by committing these crimes will makes it any better u think?

this is not the case of rioting already. this is the case of avenge. this is the case of hatred. this is the case of an uneducated and narrow minded civilians. they're not parading on the street asking for answers over the death of their 'elder', but they're on the street because of their ASBO (Anti-Social Behavior Order) attitude. they burn the building because it makes them happy to see other people suffer. they smashed and binned the shop and commit looting. they burn buses and cars for satisfaction. how are all this helped them getting answers on reasons behind the death of their beloved 'elder'?

i know the police are doing their best to prevent all these disturbance circumstances, but doesn't one burned building could lead to another? one broken shops could lead to more broken shops? and mind u, they're not gonna go and smashed one pound shops, they smashed carphone warehouses, sunglasses hut, goldsmiths..u probably got the idea by now why these shops were the main target. and oh, they're not gonna break into h&m, but JD(JD and chav? rings any bell)?!

whatever it is, no one is supporting such situation at the moment except these chav and the 'star gang'. parents play the major role in molding their kids on whats right and whats not. the community needs to understand the needs to support these kids by providing positive influence whenever necessary. while the government needs to explain what actually happen on Thursday evening and then let the city rest in piece[sic]. i just hope this will end soon, in fact very soon. its not time to do finger pointing, but instead to work together and sort it out, so we can all move on with our lives and then back to normal again.

for now, its safe to stay in and be alert. take precautions and remain safe by staying in. i am sure, i am not the only one who wants this to be over, but we all are. i am hoping the Scotland yards and the government will do whatever they can to stop this from prolong and bring the peace back to the city. fingers crossed!

-lady-

age does(not) matter

really? age does not matter? No, it really does not matter. But like everything else, there's always limit in this one too. Also, like everything else, it depends on the situation at that moment of time. How do u know when age does(not) matter? For me, its a both yes AND no. How does it not matter when its 20 years difference? Someone tell me cause i still can't register the fact that 20years gap DOES NOT MATTER.

here's the situation.

Situation 1

A girl age 25 married a man at his 50's. Come on, even a blind man can see age does matter in this case. But what does not matter to the girl is his moolah! Why would someone have a partner 20years older than them if its not for their fortunes? At 50, u can't even have proper sex! No sex, means no kids! At 50, u don't even have a teeth! At 50, u are supposed to dedicate your life to God. So, please enlighten me and tell me that the gap isn't purely based on money!

hefner and crystal..kaching!!!

they're both rich..irrelevant in this case!

Situation 2

A man age 30 is going out with a woman at her 50's. Now this one is out of this world. Why would a man go out with a woman who is 20 years older than him? Desperate? Both of them? Could it be real love? Well, love is blind they say. But i believe this one is more of a "desperate is sick". Again, prove me wrong and tell me why would a man goes out with a woman who is 20 years older than him?

madonna tops the chart really!

here's what I've gotta say.

Situation 1

This is already a norm. U simply find this relationship everywhere, they could be your neighbor even. I am not surprised if a girl choose to marry some 50 years old when all he have is 10 years and massive fortunes! money talks baby. i can name 5 with my eyes closed! so this one, is already out of questions. people might find it disgusting, but believe me, it just blend into the society nowadays. people talk, but she don't give a f*** care dude. she got money! what do u have? BIG MOUTH. so jog on now!

Situation 2

This is NOT! a man in his 30 with a woman in her 50's. well, this is happening in my everyday life if its not in yours! won't tell a soul about who are these "lovebirds". heh! the man is desperate to find love. no really! DESPERATE. the woman, who acts like she's 25 is also desperate to find a man. it might looks the same. but here's the catch. the man is desperate to find love, but he's not gonna go with her eventually. the woman is desperate to find love, and she believes that the man really is after her. i am sorry, but any 50's who act like this woman, is a definite humiliation. not just to herself, but to people around her! imagine a belly of 50 years old woman in a tight singlet. yes, that's it! a very tight singlet and a bulging belly. i pity her. she's too blind to see, but the man likes almost every girl i know. i am hoping she come to her sense before its too late, but it looks like it is now. she's gonna get hurt anytime soon. she cooks for him, do this, buy that and do everything for him. the woman is annoying anyway, it's none of my concern if they do get together for a very long time or not, but its DISGUSTING. he calls it friends for benefit. she calls it love in the air. Bless them Dear God.

No! age does not matter to me, BUT be it sensible. i am not talking about 10 years and still doesn't matter, then someone just pass me the gun..anyone! 3 years or 4 years, who cares? it would not makes any different anyway. he looks younger and that's a compliment to her. she manage to pull it together and that's good enough for him. who are we to complaint? believe me i ain't, i am just making my point. i am in one anyway, and he definitely looks way older than me! seriously, if there's really love between these two people with humongous age differences, then they're the luckiest soul alive.

i am not sorry i am loud, but i am sorry that u just don't see my point! honestly, i wish them well. i wish them all the best, and may those sour factors turn into sweet love. i am not saying its not gonna happen, i am just saying it is almost impossible. so, yeah! me and my randomness. next time people!

-lady-

Hello Ramadan

Another curtain falls..but this time, it will be longer. Ramadan come, any other Muslim observer will learn to respect the holy month. Summer is usually the best season out of all the 4 seasons. The sun makes u feel good. Well, let me tell u, in a country like this, u learn to appreciate the sun more than u stay out of it when its bright. ha ha. i can see u are giving me that 'wannabe' face as in 'dude, get over yourself! You're a Malaysian for goodness sake!' ha ha. well, at least my baby sister keep telling me the same thing when I'm obsessed with the sun.

So today, it will be the last summer for me. as in, the summer where i get to enjoy the BBQ, a nice fag under the sun and having a cold coke in my hand. I'll be the audience, watching all these happening in front of my eyes and to remain calm until the Iftar, which i supposed shouldn't be that hard. I've been doing this my whole life, fasting in Ramadan.

Having said that, BBQ or a fag under the sun, can never be as good as Ramadan. I feel so blessed that i got the chance to celebrate another Ramadan, and with God's will, i hope to be able to celebrate more Ramadan to comes. I am talking to my sister on 'whatsapp' while posting this blog. She told me mommy cook some soy sauce chicken, some french toast and nutella for 'sahur'. I miss home, i really do. I miss my family, i miss my friends and i miss my room. i miss having sahur with my family and then break fasting together. and oh, the bazaar ramadan gotta be the best part of fasting in Malaysia. Dude, the food is salivating for goodness sake. Sometimes, the Ramadan buffet which papa keep telling me and my sister 'its not worth taking u two to these buffet, you'll eat nothing more than rm10 and i paid a hefty rm50 per pax' ha ha, which is true by the way. when we were younger, it was a different story, the exposure, the motivation for us to fast was the reason for Ramadan buffet. As we get older, and all of us were working, time always seems to be the problem. But these days, buffets come for free, and that's when we go, by invitation i mean. ha ha. Also, i miss having an all girls break fasting session with my darlings. its the laugh and the never-ending story that makes it extra fun every time.

oh well, now that I'm not at home, i cook my own break fasting meals. i hope to be able to do some sardines curry puffs, 'begedil' and all these simple foods that gonna makes me feel like home. oh well, a girl gotta do what a girl gotta do. it can't be that bad! let's cherish Ramadan as its only here once a year. and just remember the gift that awaits us all when its over. and then 18hours? dude, who needs the no-carbs diet, or Atkins diet or South Beach diet or whatever. i am all Kate Moss by 1 September (yeah, i wish!).

oh yeah, got stopped by BBC journalists just now when umpy and i were at Finsbury Park. the question is

"what comes to your mind when u heard the word CHAV?"

so, me being the talkative me, i have all these explanations, opinions, recommendations whats-not, being filmed and interviewed. and then its umpy's turn

BBC: so, what do think? what goes through your mind when u heard the word chav?

umpy: well basically, i don't know what chav is, that's why i let my girlfriend do all the talking!

ha ha. even the lady who's supposed to do the interview laughed. that's umpy, he's all straight forward. if he doesn't know, means he doesn't know. he's not gonna pretend or play cool or whatever. and now that we're watching the telly, he kept saying so let's see if we'll be in BBC news or program or something. oh well, he's taking a pissed alright that man! pfft

oh and by the way, do check out the Malaysian papers if u could, we might be in there. we've been cam-whoring somewhere at the dockland and then took some pictures overlook the 'Tower Bridge' yesterday. it was a fun day despite me having some real serious issues with my headache. i need to do that MRI Scan. Ive always have these crazy headaches and stomachaches since i was younger. blimey! zaty and jihan on the other hand, were fasting yesterday. we had to stop at a pub to get water for them both and then, another pit stop along the way(we went to Delima for dinner and karaoke) for my paracetamol. i was so quiet along the way, the headache got me big time last night. Mind u, i do sing later that night(karaoke) as my headache was gone by then. it was a good Saturday indeed!

can u see the tower bridge?

i love this one (yeah, i was a bit bonkers!)

Tower Bridge

why do i have to hunch? (fat belly)

docklands

so Happy Fasting people. Have a good Ramadan! God bless us all. InsyaAllah


-lady-

my summer 'festival'

its 3 more days before we welcome the holy month of Ramadan. this is finally my summer 'festival'. surviving without any foods or drinks or fags. honestly, i don't mind not eating for 18hours or so, but i cannot bear not drinking any water especially when I'm working. i worked in a 'box' which is suffocate enough to make me vomit if i don't drink enough water. no air, no windows, no air-conditioner and its sane to say there's only Co2 in there (disgusting).

so have u make up on your missed days last year, or even years before? i already did cause if I'm at home, its always during Syawal (6 days). i made up on days that i missed last Ramadan during winter cause it has shorter daylight, which I'm pretty sure other Muslims living in a country with 4 seasons will fancy winter for paying up days that they've missed. they say u will probably feel hungry due to the cold weather, but its fine really. plus, who wanna go out when its cold?

but there's something that i struggle to do when Ramadan comes, cook and making sure it taste nice (never a problem when I'm back at home! sigh), and another gotta be the explaining part to those non-Muslim about Ramadan. the most frequent question that will be asked would be "Why are u fasting like that? Not drinking or anything at all? We fast too but we cannot eat meat yada yada yada..but why?". Its funny cause my answers seem scriptural every time. To feel grateful of what we have and stop committing too much sins that will demerit the full benefits of fasting. Also, to appreciate what we have and that not everyone have that chance to eat nice food, even eating any food all day long. All sort of answers that have got to do with appreciation. I think eventually, they will understand my point and hopefully those answers are making sense.

together we count the days, hours to Ramadan Al-Mubarak. Hence, I'm lowering myself to all of you and asking for forgiveness for all those things that I've done that might hurt u and whether or not I've done it intentionally or unintentionally. For i am only another human beings with flaws, and like u, i am just His imperfect servant. Let's cherish Ramadan for it only comes once a year and let's hope it will help us improve ourselves to be a better person, an obedient daughter/son, a hardworking student, a respected surveillance and most importantly a good Muslim.

ciao amigo!

Salam Ramadan Al-Mubarak to all Muslims wherever you are.


-lady-

tale of a neighbour

recently, a couple from next door went back home for good. no doubt they are good people. i chat with them a lot as i always bumped into them in the kitchen. but little did i know about these two very normal people.

they don't have a proper job. at one point, the boyfriend is not working at all, while the girlfriend works part time somewhere in town. but much to my surprise, they brought home different items every time. and i am not talking about spoons or plates from the pound shop, its those expensive spoons and even expensive set of knives. oh by the way, the boyfriend is a chef. one day, i saw a Nespresso coffee machine. it costs a fortune for a part-timer and a jobless to afford such coffee machine. forget the machine for now. they also bring back all these expensive meats and fish. but then, who am i to judge them. they might come from a wealthy family. or so i thought.

so we become friends. we talk and chat. they left a note on the day they leave the house. asking me to keep their mails and a farewell drink or two. so we meet up one of these days before he leave for good (the girlfriend is already back at home). i passed the mails and all, then everything starts to make sense when he opened up to me. apparently, all those stuff that i see in the house, from meats to clothes to kitchen tools (that include the Nespresso) were stolen from one of the respective store in London. i am talking about something more than just John Lewis. well the girlfriend was very good at stealing. its also safe to say that she's a professional thief. she's so good that they manage to steal that big Nespresso out of the building, let alone to bring it home. and all these stories were exposed as i had the last drink with the boyfriend before he left London for good. nevertheless, they are still as decent as we all are. no matter what they do, its none of my business. i wont poke my nose any further and i will never judge them by that.

this post wasn't meant to be about them, but it was meant to be about how people survive in big cities, which in their case, London. things that people willing to do to survive, or better off, to live luxuriously, let alone to survive. there are tonnes of stories on surviving in this mean city. Sometimes, a young girl will stop u "gracefully", asking for spare cigarettes. The most common thing would be to indulge yourself into paid sexual intercourse, especially when u have that 'job' like Belle du jour. A medical students who survive by being a 'call girl'. 'Call girl' earns at least £500/night, hence surviving the whole week.

Its amazing to endeavor in issues like this. U always thought u know a lot, but then think again. i don't simply jump into some stupid judgment just because people do stuff to live. but i admit i am sometimes judgmental towards other stuff. i mean, isn't everyone is? my neighbors are nice people. they are not bunch of wannabes, they just do what they can to survive. but if i were given a choice, i would rather asking for some 'loans' and then work my ass off for what it worth. i don't feel sorry for them for not having money to buy good stuff, neither do i feel sorry for them for stealing stuff. a drug addict could have a good heart. a killer will have his soft spot somewhere. God is great, his creation is mystery. who are we to deny the fact that we are not perfect. there are things that we do, that sometimes don't even making sense but we do it anyway. why? because its just one of those things. and in their case, maybe to live luxuriously or perhaps to survive. but i guess, I'll never know.

-lady-