what exactly do you want?

EVERYTHING really! right?

But do we need everything? Not necessarily. 

I have my family who loves me..although they're far away, but its my choice.

I have an amazing man who loves me..he too is far away, not my choice..but it is what it is.

I have friends who love me, or maybe not, but as far as i'm concern we do care for each other.

I have a roof under my head, not a big one..but its still a shelter.

I have food to eat, or fancy ones if i want.

I have a job, not as fancy, but it does support me.

I have nice clothes, nice shoes, not as expensive, but its good enough.

So what else do i want? Thats about it really.

NO! because im a human being like u. We always want more, even after we got what we want, that's one nature that nurture inside of a human brain, and its normal.

Well I have my days when i thought, why don't i get what i want? why do people get what they want even if they dont need it? I start feeling shit, start feeling sorry for myself. I start being ungrateful. I start feeling all those unwanted feelings that you could possibly think of. Its crap. I shouldn't be thinking that way, but days like these will unfortunately come every once in a while.

There's also days when i thought, ive been blessed. not everyone gets to live a life like i do. do what i want, and most importantly get what i want. I enjoy living. I am grateful having the chance to live the life that i want to live. I start looking at things in a different view. I always think of positive things.

But at the end of the day, nothing lasts forever. I know it and you know it. But I don't get YOLO! Its such a stupid things to say and live by. And because its stupid, you tend to do stupid things too. So YOLO, and you can get drunk and wake up in someone else's bed? So YOLO, and you can try a "line" and forget about it tomorrow? 

You see, even though I get what I want, I now need what I want.

I need my man by my side, not thousand miles away.

I need my family around, not across the globe.

I need a better job and a better pay.

So when I'm feeling down, i feel like everything is falling apart. But when I'm feeling great, i feel like i have got everything that i want, although i still want more. 

Satisfaction is not easy. Sacrifices are not easy either. You can choose to be selfish and have everything, and end up losing everything, or choose to be grateful, and believe that good things will eventually happens.

God has plans. His plans are always PERFECT. Make no mistake.

Most of the times, we forget to thank Him, and most of the times, we forget that we don't necessarily deserve good things that happen to us. 

Why you ask? Because, just how much do you give Him in returns of His plans for you?

 
call it whatever you want. it is what it is.

-lady-